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LESBIAN HUMOR  // Browsing posts in LESBIAN HUMOR

05 Oct Posted by in Monica Palacios | Comments Off on That Time Melissa Etheridge Gave Me 5 Minutes

That Time Melissa Etheridge Gave Me 5 Minutes

That Time Melissa Etheridge Gave Me 5 Minutes

Did I tell you about the time I met Melissa Etheridge and asked her if I could do a 5-minute comedy set before her show? Yeah–I did. So it’s Summer 1985 and I am in Los Angeles with my friend Vivian who is trying to convince me that I should move from San Francisco to […]

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09 May Posted by in LESBIAN HUMOR, Monica Palacios | Comments Off on A Queer Mother’s Day Story

A Queer Mother’s Day Story

A Queer Mother’s Day Story

Greeting customers with my voice using the mic made me feel like I had a talk show….with burgers and fries. “Would you like a hot apple pie with your meal….How about some large fries with that?…..Are you single?”

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05 Nov Posted by in Ask a Battle-axe | Comments Off on How to Find the Joy, Anyway

How to Find the Joy, Anyway

How to Find the Joy, Anyway

Another man moved behind me and he had such bad breath that when he sighed, it singed my hair. I was stuck in a surround-sound of ugliness.

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05 Sep Posted by in Monica Palacios | Comments Off on Two Words: Sock Bra

Two Words: Sock Bra

Two Words: Sock Bra

I read the decorative tag revealing that the bra was made out of soft stretchy micro fabric: 95% nylon and 5% yak hair.

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27 Mar Posted by in LESBIAN HUMOR, Monica Palacios | Comments Off on Lesbian Orgasms! A Dog’s Best Friend

Lesbian Orgasms! A Dog’s Best Friend

Lesbian Orgasms! A Dog’s Best Friend

There are no boundaries with lesbians and their precious furry friends. And that’s why during our love-making sessions, us gals experience canine interruptus.

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08 Feb Posted by in Ask a Battle-axe | Comments Off on A Battleaxe Valentine

A Battleaxe Valentine

A Battleaxe Valentine

Dear Battleaxe, Valentines Day is coming up, I’m single, and of course feeling the pressure of all this couple bullshit, romantic dinners, you know—all the Hallmark moments. It just makes me miserable, I don’t know what to do. Dear Miserable, Valentines Day is just another day on the calendar, in 24 hours it is over. […]

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20 Jul Posted by in Marga Gomez | Comments Off on That Time I Opened for Etta James

That Time I Opened for Etta James

That Time I Opened for Etta James

When I was just starting out in comedy in the 80’s I was hitchhiking in San Francisco one night, yup – me and Aileen Wournos – the last lesbian hitchhikers on the planet.  I very luckily got a ride from Lupe De Leon the manager for Etta James, Kenny Rankin and Tania Maria. I made him laugh […]

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06 Feb Posted by in Eleanor Palacios | Comments Off on Ask A Battleaxe: Should I Shave…Everything?

Ask A Battleaxe: Should I Shave…Everything?

Ask A Battleaxe: Should I Shave…Everything?

Dear Battleaxe, I’m dating someone who I haven’t had sex with yet. But I think we are about to—any day now. The problem is, she wants me to shave my pussy because she is hair-phobic. Should I do it? Or maybe just trim the front? Dear ‘Business in front— party in back’, Sounds like a […]

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11 Aug Posted by in Eleanor Palacios | Comments Off on Smelly Commuter Trains & Long Chin Hairs

Smelly Commuter Trains & Long Chin Hairs

Smelly Commuter Trains & Long Chin Hairs

Dear Battleaxe, I live in San Francisco and take public transportation to work. The afternoon trains are crowded and smelly. What can I do about the bad smelling people on the evening trains? Dear PT Advocate, Good for you for taking public transportation! Less cars on the road! Crowded buses or trains are not fun. Just […]

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03 Aug Posted by in Monica Palacios | Comments Off on Monica Palacios: A Lesbian Packing Primer

Monica Palacios: A Lesbian Packing Primer

Monica Palacios: A Lesbian Packing Primer

Packing for a trip is painful. It’s equivalent to shopping for bras—you gotta do it, there’s a lot of huffing and puffing and eventually your nipples get pinched—and not in a good way. It takes me all day to pack. I put stuff in my suitcase then I take stuff out. I try on clothes […]

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